I might as well be Bridget Jones
I know as I write this I’ll begin to realize that my problems are minuscule compared to others but right now, at 2 o’clock in the morning with my headphones on, they’re gigantic. (the problems not the headphones)
I just finished a personality test that told me there was 1-3% of the population with the same traits as me. I know it’s a big world, with billions of people, but 1% seems like an awfully small number. I’m all alone and have been all my life. Sometimes I think about saying things and then I stop because nobody would understand or get my joke and I can’t take that, not again. So I shut up, it’s better that way. Although sometimes it does get lonely.
I finished a university course, good for me, it was only a year long. I have no job, no money and what’s worse is I don’t seem to care. Well, of course I care I feel like a loser but maybe I don’t because I’m not even trying to get a job. It scares me and not just getting the job, what terrifies me is once I have it. I love chasing things, dreams, people but once I have them up close I lose interest, they disappoint me. I worked so hard to play on the top soccer team as a kid but once I got there, the coach and pressure was too much to handle so I contemplated quitting soccer altogether. I had a crush on this boy in elementary school and I worked for weeks trying to get him to like me, once I found out he did, I suddenly lost interest. I never want to be the kind of person who hates their job, hates their life. Unfortunately without a job I hate my life so it’s kind of a double edged sword; get a job and hate my life or don’t get a job and hate my life.
I never seem to be skinny enough to please myself, but I don’t have the will power to eat less. I’m just stuck staring in the mirror, loathing my fat ass.
So maybe my problems are generic - overweight, single, no job…okay I might as well be Bridget Jones but it doesn’t mean they don’t plague me, daily.
thoughts during The Avengers
- Loki has the ultimate troll faces
- seriously soo many gifs!
- about Chris Evans - ‘dat ass’
- about Scarlett Johansson - ‘dat ass’
- thanks to tumblr all I kept thinking when Thor summoned his hammer was ‘accio hammer’
- Natasha and Clint are the cutest couple ever!
- and both sexy as hell (there’s something about a man with a bow and arrow)
- speaking of cute the Stark and Banner bromance is freakin adorable
- hmm this needs more Pepper, oh look there she is! aww they kissed
- Mr Whedon you have thoroughly destroyed my soul… well played
how is it that I’m so uninspired to do anything?
Mr Thornton meets Nicki Minaj
Just finished watching North & South now listening to Dance (A$$) and imagining Mr. Thornton in a club. Bwahahaha
- mom: Are you wearing perfume?
- me: No.
- mom: Why does this cracker smell like perfume?
- mom: Wait that doesn't make sense...
- mom: maybe it's my hand.
- me: *face palm*
insomnia
Can’t sleep… why does life have to suck so bad sometimes. The older I get the more I feel like a confused terrified little kid. As if the world is spiraling into chaos, spinning out of control. I’ve had my happiest times followed very closely by the worst events of my life. When does it all slow down?
